By Joni Eareckson Tada
Advent: the cost of rubies -- The anger that heals -- respiring room -- by no means on my own -- adequate grace -- stay when you are ready -- A legacy of prayer -- desire past solutions -- larger through a ways -- Why could He say no? -- at the back of enemy traces -- end: Marching to Zion
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Additional resources for A lifetime of wisdom : embracing the way God heals you
Laboratory white. Dead white. And here I am, Joni Eareckson, lying naked under a thin white sheet, waiting to be experimented on. I’m in the middle of a white, sterile box, stuck here by the force of gravity, drowning in a white darkness. Can’t move. Can’t feel. Just breathing and eating. That’s it. That’s life. Do other people see themselves this way? Just existing? No . . they don’t know it because they have too many things to distract them from the awful emptiness. They’re busy doing stuff — holding down jobs, going to college, walking and running around.
You may not have MS or diabetes, you may not be a quadriplegic like me, but you definitely have days when you feel like you’re sinking, drowning, going down for the third time. Try as you will, you simply can’t meet everyone’s expectations.
Your hands were crossed on top of your abdomen. You’re okay. ” Easy for her to say. Maybe next time, she’ll be too late. Maybe next time that thing will smother me. FORTY YEARS LATER At the best of times, quadriplegia is confinement. At the worst of times, it is near suffocation. Claustrophobia is an adversary I’ve had to deal with since those earliest days in ICU after my accident, strapped in upside down and so tight to my metal and canvas Stryker frame that all I could move was my head — slightly.